For a minute or two I like to close my eyes and take a deep breath and reflect about life, the things I've done that have touched me in a way that I can't really explain. I like to think that I have ability to make everyone happy, even though that is one of the biggest lies I keep in my head, because I find myself trying so hard and failing in every attempt of gaining a smile… because it doesn't last for long.
If I could do things differently I would change that part of me of pleasing those whom will never do the same… but I can't, or maybe I just don't want to, I like to be a giver instead of receive, why is that? why is it that I can't just let people down? why do I even bother to bring it up? maybe and just maybe I can't actually talk about it with no one, unless that person feels the same way, a part of me wants to let go… and also want a second chance.